A man was walking down the street
when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man
who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet,
extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy
some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years
ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing
instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing,"
the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees
at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless
man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman
in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten
lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going
to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific
dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded.
"Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I
probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's
important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer,
fishing, golf, and sex."
